Wednesday, December 14, 2011

A Plea for Impulsiveness

Have you ever known something about yourself that you thought other people did not like or appreciate, or thought was "wrong" about you? Well, I am impulsive! I have worked for years to curb this tendency, to think before I act, to carefully weigh risks and benefits before acting. But, in spite of often being reminded of the down-side and unintended consequences of my impulsive actions, I have decided that it is actually one of the most unique, passionate, kind,  and remarkable things about myself.

What really goes on, is that rather than thinking, and analyzing, and evaluating and then reaching a rational or logical conclusion which guides my acting upon these thoughts, I totally bypass my mind and do what my heart tells me i need to do. I don't even think it is a simple or primarily "emotional" response (because if it was i would spend my entire brief time being alive doing these impulsive acts.)  It is something between inspiration, intuition, and insight that constitutes my "gift" of impulsiveness. Sadly, not all my impulses are effective and some may, at times, upset or hurt the person I desire to treat in a positive and nurturing way. But you do not have to know me long, or even know me well, and sometimes not know me at all to be the beneficiary of my impulsiveness,

So I trust my instincts, rely on my moral compass, and act without hesitation or self-doubt when I am impulsive. Having noted this, I do so for a reason. Rather than treating this tendency as a "weed" in my personality garden, I am now going to treat it as my most prized "flower" my rarest and sweetest bud. I am going to nurture it and to practice it with abandon. When "you" are the recipient of my impulsive actions, you will know what I mean by all this. Until then, consider yourself on a "waiting list". You will not know me without learning how impulsive I really am.

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